


Sono solo lacrime

by WillEvince



Category: Fabrizio moro - Fandom, ermal meta - Fandom, metamoro - Fandom
Genre: M/M, Multi, Titanic AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-23
Updated: 2018-11-07
Packaged: 2019-08-06 10:02:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 8
Words: 13,702
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16385864
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WillEvince/pseuds/WillEvince
Summary: Everyone knows the story of the movie Titanic. Take that, add Metamoro, a little twist, and what do you get?This.





	1. E non è proprio niente di speciale

**Author's Note:**

> I'd like to thank Julia for reading this and supporting me all the way through the weirdest struggles while deciding certain things. <3  
> P.S. also sorry the ending made you cry... Pls don't hate me

"All in, damn it, I don't have time" Ermal muttered, quickly shoving whatever coins he had into the middle of the table. The two men who he was playing against, gargled (there's no way to describe their laugh) and shared a glance. They were sure that they had Ermal cornered. But not this time - Ermal still had an ace up his sleeve. Not literally, mind you, he thought it would have been trashy to cheat in a game of poker. But he still held a hand that contained three kings, so Ermal was damn sure that he would win. Both of the men turned their cards revealing a pair of dames in one and a trio of sevens in the other. Ermal's smile widened. He proudly slammed his cards onto the table, quickly tugged at Andrea, sitting next to him, collected as many of the coins as he could, but lastly, he grabbed the two tickets that would get him and Andrea on the biggest cruise ship - "Titanic".

"Come on now, we mustn't be late" Andrea rushed as he tried to find his way through the crowd to the entrance of the ship. Somewhere along the way he lost Ermal, who was always not too far behind, but in the end they managed to make it inside just in time. The tickets they won in the poker game were only for a third class cabin, under the deck, but, really, neither Ermal nor Andrea could care less. They were _on the Titanic_. That was all that mattered.

"Ah man, I could get used to this" Andrea happily exclaimed as they made their way to the cabin.

"Enjoy it while it lasts, my friend" Ermal cheekily smiled, finally opening the door to their tiny cabin. It only had two bunk beds, a little table with a chair and a small round window, that was just above the waterline.

"I get the top bunk!" Andrea screamed before Ermal could even form a single thought. He watched as Andrea hopped onto his bed and relaxed for a couple of seconds.

"Fine. But we both know that you'll end up in my arms by midnight anyway, so..." Ermal giggled and walked towards Andrea. His bed was so high up that when Andrea laid down, his head was exactly in the perfect height for Ermal to step closer and plant a little kiss on the tip of his nose.

"Cute" Andrea murmured, turning away, pretending to be insulted, whilst Ermal let out an adorable laugh and went over to the window. For now their cabin faced the sea instead of the port, so nothing too interesting was happening outside...  
  


 

"So what do you want to do first?" Andrea exclaimed the moment he decided he's had enough of pretending to be insulted.

"Everything and whatever's free" Ermal smiled, looking around the cabin for one last time and then making his way to the door.

"Great. We can start with shuffleboard" Andrea said and hopped off the bed. He swayed for a second, getting adjusted to standing on a gently rocking ship, but then smiled widely, took Ermal's hand and left the cabin. They climbed back upstairs to the deck and went to the very front of the ship. As they were going, a loud horn sounded, announcing the departure. People both on board and still on the port were waving goodbye and despite the fact that Ermal didn't know anyone down there (except maybe for those two guys that had just lost their tickets to the Titanic and seemed quite pissed), both he and Andrea waved at the people.

Finally, the ship swam further away from the port. It turned to face west and slowly started making its way to New York. Ermal ran to the very front of the ship, jumped on the handrail and screamed in joy. Strong wind breezing through his hair, sweetly messing it up, sun warming up his cheeks, the smell of sea once again taking him away from reality. Ermal closed his eyes.

"Oh would you look at the _royalty_ " suddenly Andrea whispered, bringing Ermal's thoughts back to Earth.

"What?" he asked and looked around. He didn't know what he was supposed to be looking at.

"I'm talking about the first class snobs. Just look at them. Fancy suits, huge dresses, and, oh, so many diamonds, so many jewels... it's like... what do they even need those for in the middle of the ocean?" Andrea expressed his disappointment in humanity, shook his head and turned back to the sea. For him, obviously, that was a much better view. But Ermal had noticed quite an interesting persona among all those _snobs_. Tall, strong, tattooed man, squeezing himself into a lovely three piece suit, but since it was warm out today, he had taken the jacket off and rolled up his pearl white sleeves. And they were _perfectly white_. To the point that Ermal even felt uncomfortable - from one glance you could tell that he was poor, that he had been wearing these clothes for a week at least and he did not have the means to properly wash them even. This tattooed man was awkwardly clenching the hand of a very fancy lady. They were talking to some other rich couple and after a few minutes they all went to the restaurant.

"Who was that..?" Ermal murmured once again drawing Andrea's attention to the _snobs_.

"Who cares? Those pricks don't give a rat's ass for people like us, so I won't even give them my time of day" Andrea answered, trying to grasp Ermal's attention. It was only after the tattooed man's back disappeared among the crowd, when Ermal finally turned back to the sea. Ermal sighed and caught Andrea's glance:

"You're being too mean about them" he gently said, which resulted in an eye roll. But after that Andrea nodded his head as if admitting defeat.

"Alright, fine, if it makes you feel any better, I'll stop calling them rich snobs, okay?" Andrea smiled and giggled, leaning in closer.

"That's all I ask for" Ermal replied bearing an even wider smile. "I mean we at least owe it to them to get to know them first before judging" he added, and Andrea, of course, only rolled his eyes again.

"And yet they never extend that courtesy to us."

Ermal pressed his lips together "Maybe, but we can be the bigger person, right? We can be better than them at least in this way" he murmured, and Andrea seemed to like this point. He smiled, looked back at the _snobs_ and then turned to meet Ermal's gaze once again. Meta could tell he wanted to say something, but instead of that, Andrea just leaned in for a soft kiss. He was always gentle, always very careful and caring, as if he was afraid that one stronger tug at Ermal would somehow shatter him. Andrea treated him as if Ermal was made of glass. And _goddammit_ , did he love it...

 

  
As soon as the moon reached its peak in the night's sky, Ermal got up from the bed. Just as he predicted before, sometime during the night, Andrea snuck into his arms, so Ermal had to be careful not to wake him. He quietly got dressed, took one glance at the weather outside, leaned closer to place a kiss on Andrea's forehead and then stepped out of the cabin. As soon as he got back on deck, he breathed in deeply, enjoying the neverending smell of sea. And a hint of... _pine_? Ermal looked around, expecting to maybe see an island nearby or something that could be emitting this forest-y smell, but the only thing that caught his eye was a lonely man, leaning over the handrail. Ermal wasn't really in the mood for conversation, so he thought it might be better if he picked another spot on the ship to relax. And yet before he could take a step, he saw the man starting to climb over to the other side. _He was getting ready to jump_.

"Hey!" Ermal shouted to him, but the sound of motors, wind and crashing waves stole his voice. The man was still hanging on to the handrail tightly, but Ermal could see his hands shiver. He was gathering the courage to just let go. He was getting ready to die. Ermal could not let that happen. He ran to this man as fast as he could, but he started slipping right before Ermal's eyes. The man started leaning forward, his fists unclenched and he _let go_...

At the very last second Ermal barely managed to grab the man's arm. His fall was stopped, he slammed into the side of the ship.

"Come on now, get up" Ermal ordered him and started pulling. The man seemed reluctant at first, trying to escape from Ermal's grip but gave in in the end. He climbed back onto the handrail and Ermal basically dragged him back to the safe side, latching onto this man, hugging him as if an old friend.

"Now what in God's name were you thinking?" Ermal whispered and finally looked into the eyes of the man he had just saved. Of course, he recognized him. "What's your name?"  he quietly asked.

"I'm Fabrizio..." he answered in the most sexy, husky voice. "Why did you stop me? I didn't want you to do that..." Fabrì added and his tone made Ermal's heart absolutely shatter.

"Maybe so. But I wanted to have a chance to change your mind" he smiled and took a little step back, as if giving Fabrì a choice.


	2. Una per ogni passo fatto insieme

"How are you planning to do that?" Fabrizio asked, smiling gently, making Ermal's heartbeat fasten.

"I was hoping first you'd tell me what's gotten you so down" finally Ermal whispered, his voice barely reaching Fabrì over the loud waves, crashing onto the sides of the ship.

"You know, it's just one of those things... You sit there, surrounded by posh people you either don't know or hate, and it's always the same everyday: the same dull conversations, the same disgust in everyone's eyes when you so much as mention that it all shouldn't be about the money... I was forced to marry a girl I didn't love, you know. Only because that's what expected of me. That I should marry, create a family and take over the family business once my father passes. Someone planned everything out for me perfectly, it seems, except... this isn't my life. It's not how I want things to be" after a couple of seconds Fabrizio poured his heart out, almost making Ermal feel uncomfortable because up til now he naturally assumed that rich people were undoubtedly happy. That money indeed brought happiness, but seeing a man as broken down as Fabrizio, certainly shattered some of the views Ermal had.

"What would you like to do then?" he quietly asked. Fabrizio only thought about it for a second:

"Anything".

Ermal grinned at that, already trying to think of ways he could brighten up Fabrizio's night.

"Sorry, I didn't catch your name..?" after a few moments Fabrì realized and glanced at Ermal.

"It's... Gigi. Short for Gianluigi" finally he murmured.

"What are you doing up in the middle of the night?" he smiled.

"I've always loved the stars. I figured they'd be at their absolute uttermost beauty over the ocean" Ermal explained and immediately looked up at the sky. That night was an exceptionally clear night. A full moon and billions of tiny stars illuminated the dark waves below, gently rocking the beauty that was the Titanic.

"Do you know much about astronomy?" Fabrizio asked, following Ermal's gaze. At one point Fabrì's hand brushed against Ermal's but he didn't think much of it.

"I don't, really. Never went to a fancy school like that..." he said  whilst being unable to take his eyes off the marvelous skies above.

"Would you like to learn..?" after a couple of minutes of silence, Ermal finally heard an offer he surely could not refuse.

 

 

Turns out, Fabrizio was absolutely serious with his offer. He had taken an interest in astronomy back in the day and honestly could share the knowledge now if that were what Ermal wanted. And really, it seemed like a win-win situation, because Ermal would find out some more about space and it would be something different for Fabrizio to do. Obviously, he had never tought a commoner before so he looked at it as an adventure. For that night, however, they chose to part. Ermal said he had to come back to his cabin, and Fabrì was willing to do the same. Ermal noticed a different sparkle in Fabrizio's eyes which wasn't there before and, really, it was the one thing that made Ermal trust Fabrì won't do something stupid again just yet.

Ermal didn't want to give the number of his cabin and neither did Fabrì, so instead they decided to meet up right there, in front of the ship, at midnight. Hopefully by then the other residents will have gone to sleep and they'll be able to go about their things in peace. For now they've said goodbye and parted.  Ermal slowly made his way back to the cabin and found a shivering Andrea sitting by the porthole and staring at the sea.

"I woke up and you were gone" he said the second Ermal got close enough.

"I know, i went outside to look at the stars" he smiled and placed a gentle kiss on Andrea's forehead. He sighed.

"Oh yeah... You always do that... It still freaks me out" Andrea giggled, rubbed his eyelids with the tips of his fingers and finally looked up at Ermal. "Did you see anything interesting?" Andrea asked, and Ermal actually lingered before answering. He knew how Andrea felt about the snobs, so maybe it wasn't quite the best idea to say that he saved one of them from drowning. And he definitely didn't want to describe him as a mysterious teacher he had just found... So in the end Ermal just shook his head.

"Nothing too great. I might need to come back tomorrow." He smiled and Andrea just nodded his head.

"Okay, thanks for the warning. I'll try not to panic the next time" he said and quietly made his way back to the bunk bed. The lower one. He lied down and opened his arms waiting for Ermal to join. He, of course, could not reject this offer. Ermal crawled into Andrea's arms, snuggled up to him, tried to muffle the giggling once he started covering Ermal's entire face with kisses, and in the end, calmly watched him fall asleep. Ermal however could not stop thinking about what he had just done. He saved a life. And he was happy about that. But he also decided to meet up at midnight with this strange man... Not even the gentle stroking and twirling of Andrea's curls could calm Ermal down - the train of thought never seemed to stop, and so Ermal spent the night restless, holding his love in his arms, but hopelessly thinking about another man and desperately trying to solve the enigma that he was.

 

 

The next day Ermal felt even more uneasy than before. He couldn't decide whether he should go meet up with Fabrizio at midnight or whether he should stay behind and just sleep alongside Andrea. _That one meeting won't even mean much, right? We're just gonna talk about stars. Purely educational._ Ermal tried to convince himself but in the end he had to admit he was lying. He was _interested_ in Fabrizio. And not just in what he had to say about the stars, but in _him_. And that was wrong. He had Andrea and he loved him dearly. Ermal absolutely could not be spending time with someone else like that...

"Are you feeling alright? You've been awfully quiet this morning" Andrea asked, finally pulling Ermal out of whatever pit of thoughts he had fallen into.

"Yes, I'm fine. I guess... I didn't get enough sleep last night, that's it" Ermal answered while making his way through the canteen, trying to choose what to eat for breakfast. Given the fact that it was almost noon and whatever was left on the table was basically leftover from whatever first class and second class ticket holders didn't manage to eat, there really wasn't a lot to choose from. It, however, didn't matter to Andrea. He had already shoved all the cheese slices he could find on the tiny bits of bread and he was having a feast. Ermal didn't feel like eating at all.

"I think I'll go out for some fresh air" finally he said, catching Andrea's attention.

"Okay, amore, can I come with? I'll just finish these real quick..." he asked while swiftly stuffing his face with bread and cheese. Ermal couldn't help but laugh at that site. And he also couldn't help but realize just how fucking much he loved this crazy man.

Like they had planned, they walked back onto the deck. The couple decided to go to the very front of the ship and sit on the handrails, much like they did the day before while they were looking around, staring at the people entering the restaurant. _When Ermal noticed Fabrizio amongst the crowd_. For a moment there Ermal heard a familiar voice calling for "Gigi" a couple of times. But since Ermal didn't react (that really was the hardest thing), Fabrizio soon quieted down.

After spending the whole day with Andrea running around the ship, and then wasting away the evening drinking beer and making love, Ermal was almost looking forward to the mysterious midnight date. He almost wanted to know what Fabrizio will say, what will he be wearing, whether he'll have the courage to touch Ermal's hand in order to show the stars more accurately, whether, if anything, he will show up smiling, hoping for that change in his life... As soon as Andrea fell asleep, Ermal got up, dressed up and slowly walked outside. As much as his heart yerned for adventure, his conscience was trying to stop him in every step of the way. Gladly (sadly?) that didn't work. Ermal went up to the same spot where he met Fabrizio yesterday and waited. Midnight came around and passed. Stars started to dim. Sun shyly peaked up from under the waves... and yet Fabrizio never showed up.


	3. Una per tutte quelle notti svegli ad ascoltare canzoni d'amore

Needless to say, Ermal was disappointed. Yet he couldn't even explain why. Was he disappointed because he got stood up by some man he just met yesterday? Was he disappointed because he had some sort of weird hopes for their friendship and for an adventure? Or was it more of a depressing type of feeling? Because as time went on, Ermal realized there might have been another reason why Fabrizio didn't show up. He was ready to dive into the ocean just yesterday, surely, those kinds of thoughts couldn't have been cured in less than 24 hours. Ermal suddenly felt like someone had ripped open his chest and whatever was inside, now was slowly bleeding out. He felt _guilty_. Guilty for leaving so soon last night. Guilty for telling Fabrizio a false name. Guilty for not reacting to his calls whilst on the deck earlier that day. Ermal felt as if he had taken a vital part in another man's suicide... and that was enough to break him.

Ermal frantically ran back to the cabin and woke Andrea up, already in tears, already shaking, struggling to find words.

"Tessorino, what happened?" Andrea jumped up from the bed and leaped into Ermal's arms.

"I don't know, I don't... I think I might have done something... bad" he sobbed, clinging onto Andrea even harder.

"You know you can tell me anything..." he whispered but Ermal still took his time. He needed a good fifteen minutes until he finally calmed down. Andrea lead him back to the bed and sat him down, still stroking the messy curls, planting soft little kisses all over Ermal's face.

"I met a man yesterday..." finally Ermal started, and he could already feel Andrea tense up. "He was getting ready to jump overboard but I managed to catch him..." he continued and Andrea released a deep sigh.

"Oh, amore, you saved his life. I'm proud of you" he whispered and smiled, leaning in closer for a kiss on the lips, but Ermal hadn't finished talking yet.

"I wanted to help him, I really did. Maybe he only needed someone to talk to, you know" Ermal breathed in and swallowed his tears "He said to meet him at midnight last night... but he never showed up" despite his best efforts, Ermal started crying again, which caused Andrea to cuddle up even closer to him. "What if... what if he went through with it? What if he... I should have stayed that night. I should have talked to him then, I should have..."

"Piccolino, please, we don't know _that's_ what happened. Maybe he just... had too much to drink during dinner and fell asleep?" as always, Andrea was being logical and reasonable, which just drove Ermal up the wall. He wanted to be mad, he wanted to hate himself, he wanted to hate the whole world, he needed to scream and shout and punch a hole in the wall, not... _be reasonable_.

"Maybe we should try and find him? Do you know his name?" Andrea offered, gently stroking Ermal's back. He started shaking his head.

" _I_ should find him. Okay? I have to do that by myself" finally Ermal answered. Andrea quietly agreed by simply nodding.

"I'll be here if you need me" he murmured but Ermal didn't pay attention to Andrea's words. He was already on his way to the restaurant.

Just as he might have guessed, he wasn't allowed inside. The doorman was refusing to let anyone but first class ticker holders inside, and he definitely didn't believe Ermal _knew a Fabrizio who may or may not be inside whom he needed to talk to_. Ermal didn't give up though. He was standing on the tips of his toes, trying to look over the doorman's shoulders, trying to spot a familiar face... and he did. He noticed a lovely dark haired girl walking around with a cup if tea. Ermal saw her on the first day - she was holding onto Fabrizio's hand, and Ermal took a guess that she must be his wife. She, however, didn't seem sad or worried. So either she didn't know, or she didn't care.

"FABRIZIO!" finally he yelled, getting the girl's attention. She looked at Ermal as if he was crazy and quickly walked away. "NO, please, I need to talk to him!" he tried explaining but the girl wouldn't listen. She quickly disappeared from Ermal's sight and he growled in disappointment.

"Please leave or I will have you removed" the doorman finally said, trying to push Ermal away from the door. Surely a third class passenger yelling at random people was bad for business. So Ermal gave up and walked away. Much like any other time, he sat down on the handrail and decided to wait it out. This girl was bound to leave the restaurant _sometime_. And it only took her about an hour. Ermal noticed her purple dress and quickly ran over to her. The girl was startled. She clearly was about to call out for someone but Ermal beat her to it.

"Your husband. Is he okay? Please, tell me he's okay". It was the worry in Ermal's voice that won her over, so it would seem.

"Why don't you ask him yourself?" she gently answered, placing a hand on Ermal's shoulder and turing him to another direction, pointing at Fabrizio who was alive and well, talking to some men. Ermal released a loud sigh of relief.

"How do you two know each other?" the girl wondered.

"We don't really... Just ran into each other the other day".

Fabrizio looked up at his wife and was visibly surprised when he noticed Ermal standing right beside her. Needless to say, he cut the conversation short and quickly made his way to the duo.

"Gigi, I see you've met Giada" he smiled, glancing at his wife. And while he truly cared about her, Ermal noticed that there was no love in his eyes.

"I suppose so" Ermal murmured "can we talk? Alone? Please?" he added and pointed to one part of the deck that wasn't cluttered with people. Giada quickly excused herself, Fabrizio took a deep breath and walked over.

"I know what you're going to say, I'm sorry I didn't show up, I freaked out and..."

"I thought you had killed yourself!" Ermal exclaimed.

"What?" Fabrì's voice only bore confusion.

"When you didn't show up, I thought... you had done something stupid and then... I thought what an idiot I was to have let you go that night without even talking" he voiced his frustration and took one more deep breath.

"No, no, it's nothing like that. Giada wouldn't fall asleep, and I didn't want her to know about this. I wouldn't want her to think much of it" Fabrizio explained and smiled, once again waking up the butterflies in Ermal's stomach. "Are you still up for that astronomy lesson?" he added.

"Right now?" Ermal took a tiny step back.

"Unless you're busy?" Fabrì asked and while, yes, Ermal _was_ a bit busy - he could've spent the day with Andrea, much like he had intended to from the moment of arrival - at that second he forgot Andrea even existed.

"No, of course. But wouldn't it work better if we could actually see the stars?" Ermal wondered.

"I thought we could start with theory. I have a couple of books in my cabin... Shall we?" Fabrizio pointed the way in anticipation of Ermal's answer. Obviously, he agreed without a second thought. While stepping away, Ermal looked back at the deck. He saw Giada still talking to some people, and he saw Andrea in the very front of the ship, sitting on the handrail, staring at the sea. For a second, Ermal felt guilty. He _knew_ his motives weren't exactly pure when it came to Fabrizio. But all it took was for Fabrì to gently place a hand on Ermal's shoulder, and his conscience shut down.

With every step he took, Ermal felt increasingly more guilty. He thought about Andrea, sitting somewhere all alone, probably waiting for his love to come back so that they can snuggle up somewhere and enjoy the view, but that wasn't enough to make Ermal turn around. He had to admit something to himself though - this was (whatever it was) in _no way_ about astronomy anymore. If at first it really was the thing that caught Ermal's attention, by now it's become insignificant. Right now his curiosity meter was hitting the absolute highest amounts thanks to Fabrizio. Ermal had so many questions. He wanted to know about this man, about his life, his choices in it and why he made them, he wanted to ask about Giada, about their relationship, whether they already have any kids or not... It _seemed_ harmless. But Ermal couldn't help but also wonder what it would be like to feel his tattooed hand brush against his cheek, to feel his fingertips find their way through Ermal's skin, over every scar and dimple, to, lastly, steal a little kiss, just for fun - just to see what those lips taste like. Surely those rose red, plump beauties had to have had a curious taste. And Ermal was eager to find that out. And he probably would if there wasn't an Andrea stopping him.

They made their way to the cabin without saying a single word. Fabrizio lived on the top floor, in one of the larger suites that were the size of maybe 10 Ermal's cabins. Or even more. While the interior was red and gold in color, the furniture resembled the victorian era, which gave the whole room an illusion of royalty. For a moment there Ermal really did feel like he had just stepped into the room of a prince.

Fabrizio walked over to him and handed Ermal a tiny, dark blue book.

"What's this?" Ermal immediately asked, staring at the cover. 'The principles of astronomy' - of course, he should have known.

"I also had a book on planets somewhere around here" Fabrizio murmured while shuffling all his stuff around. Ermal thought that maybe it wouldn't be so bad to actually find out more about the planets. Ermal knew there were eight in the solar system. And that's pretty much where his knowledge ended.

"How rude of me... would you like some tea?" after a while Fabrì remember and smiled, looking up at Ermal, stopping his search for a while.

"Tea's alright" Ermal answered, once again, feeling butterflies in his stomach due to Fabrizio's smile.

"Or do you prefer wine?" He asked and Ermal shyly nodded. He didn't _actually_ prefer wine, but he figured alcohol might help in this situation. _Help do what?_ Even he didn't know, really.

Despite Ermal's best efforts, they really did spend most of the time sipping wine over astronomy books. Nothing happened, and while Ermal's brain could be proud of that, his heart craved for something more. Which is why before he left, carrying the books in his hands, Ermal turned to Fabrizio.

"Would you like to meet up again?" he wondered "At midnight? And actually do so this time?" Ermal smiled. That was the moment Fabrizio realized Ermal had a lot more than studying on his mind and he needed a few seconds to think everything over.

"You know, Giada is at a dinner party tonight anyway, you can stay if you'd like" Fabrì smirked, leaning up against the doorframe, almost blocking the way, preventing Ermal from leaving. He clenched onto the books even tighter as his conscience went wild, and as every little piece of his heart started catching fire. Before Ermal could answer, he felt Fabrizio's fingertips, slowly making their way up Ermal's arm.


	4. Quelle che fanno sempre stare male

"Tell me if you want me to stop" at some point Fabrizio whispered while leaning in even closer, his chest almost pressed against Ermal's hands that were still tightly grasping onto the books, his fingers slowly climbing up Ermal's back,  gently brushing against the back of his neck. Ermal stopped breathing. As he stared at the rose red lips getting closer and closer, all he could think about was Andrea. He shouldn't hurt him like this, he doesn't deserve that, Andrea had always been nothing but amazing, always by Ermal's side, unconditionally, for years now. Ermal couldn't just throw it all away for some man be barely knew. For some married man. With whom he'd surely wouldn't even have a future. It's not worth it. It won't bring him anything good, just a handful of broken hearts. _It was not worth it_.

Yet Ermal still went for it. The books dropped on the floor, his arms wrapped around Fabrizio's neck and before Ermal could change his mind, he dived in for a kiss. It was anything but gentle. Just two seconds in and Fabrizio was already pinning Ermal to the wall, his hands clenching onto his hair, pulling it, forcing Ermal to give in, to let go, to, oh, not so subtly moan. Fabrizio's lips slid lower down to his neck and as soon as Ermal felt a little bit of pressure, he pushed the man away

"Please don't do that...". _Obviously, he didn't need any evidence_.

"Hmpf" was all Fabrizio could muster up before going back up and leeching onto Ermal's lips again. Ermal's fingers wandered down Fabrì's chest, started undoing the buttons one by one, Fabrizio then took the shirt off, showing off his chest muscles and even more tattoos. While Ermal was staring at them, Fabrì showered his face with soft little kisses. It all seemed like a very succesful distraction. Because Ermal honestly hadn't noticed at which point did they move away from the wall. And yet now they were halfway across the room, finding their way to the surprisingly huge bed. Fabrizio grabbed Ermal's belt and started undoing it. Ermal then pressed his lips against Fabrì's for another kiss, only disturbed by sighs and moans. As Fabrizio's hand slid down to touch the obvious bulge, Ermal felt a smile forming on Fabrì's lips.

"Gigi..." he gently muttered.

That was when Ermal snapped out of it. He immediately shoved Fabrizio, he fell onto the bed but instead of getting the hint, Fabrì just smirked as if being absolutely fascinated by Ermal taking control like that. _How curious_ for a second there Ermal thought.

"I'm sorry, I have to go..." finally he just murmured and zipped his pants back up. Ermal ran back to the door, collected his books, and by the time he stood back up, Fabrizio was already there.

"Did I do something wrong? I thought you wanted this" he said. That worried look on his face almost broke Ermal's heart.

"No, you were... great. It's not that. I... you're married..." _that was the easiest thing he could say at this point_. And since Fabrizio took a step back, obviously, being a little bit hurt by Ermal's words, he now had enough space to slip out of the cabin and run back to deck. Of course, Ermal went to the very front, where he found Andrea, still sitting there, still enjoying the view.

"Amore?" Ermal whispered, already feeling the guilt flush his chest, an ugly redness cover his cheeks. Andrea turned around, smiling, but as soon as he saw Ermal standing there, on the verge of tears, he jumped back onto deck and took Ermal into his arms.

"What happened? Did he do something to you?" Andrea asked already tracing the skin with his fingertips, looking for any signs of injury.

"No, it's not that... I think I..." Ermal looked down at the books he was still clenching. _The most obvious reminder of my mistake_. Ermal should have just thrown them overboard. Right there and then. And yet, he only pressed those books even closer to his chest.

"You know what, I have a surprise for you" Andrea smiled. "I was waiting for a better moment, but I suppose it might be exactly what you need right now to cheer up". Ermal looked up at him with curiosity sparkling in his eyes.

 

 

Ermal had to make one last stop at the cabin where he shoved the books he got under a pillow, and then Andrea grabbed his arm and dragged him all the way around the ship. They went through some really shady areas, some of which were filled with furnaces, some of which were filled with dumpsters, until finally they reached a hard metal door.

"This looks like a jail cell" Ermal whispered leaning in closer to trace the cold metal with his fingertips "Look, Andrea, if you're angry about something, I'm sure we can talk about it - no need to lock me up forever and leave me to die" he giggled, while seeing his love roll his eyes and groan.

"No. Stop talking. Don't ruin it" finally Andrea said, laughed, quickly placed a kiss on Ermal's cheek and went through the door, closing it behind him. Ermal was left alone in a barely lit, hot, steamy room, that was surely a lot dirtier than any other place on the ship. _What the hell is Andrea up to?_

At that moment the heavy door slowly slid open once more and Andrea walked outside smiling widely, pointing at the kitchen chef he'd brought alongside.

"This is Dino. He used to be my neighbour back in the day. And it's a good thing we stay in touch, _caaaause_ he's a chef here and can hook us up. Can't you, Dino?" Andrea asked and gave the chef on of his to-die-for puppy faces. Ermal had been on the receiving end of such a face far too many times to not know what effect it has. Needless to say, Dino caved instantly.

"Look, I can't get you into first class, but I can shove a couple of things around in second class, will that be okay?" he sighed.

"That will be perfect" Andrea smiled.

"Well, alright then. Step inside. Don't stand there in the furnace room, it's dangerous down there. Though, I suppose, you couldn't have used the staff entrance either..." Dino murmured while Andrea nodded his head.

"And it took me _hours_ to find this" he slapped the metal door and giggled. Dino walked away, leaving Andrea and Ermal to look around the kitchen. The staff were already preparing food for lunch, so there was a lot going on.

After maybe fifteen minutes Dino came back and proudly announced that he had found a table the waiters can set up just for the two of them. Of course, Andrea accepted, and Ermal, really, just went along with it. At this point, he had found out it's better not to disturb Andrea when he's onto something. Despite the fact that this part of the restaurant wasn't first class, it was obviously so much more elegant than the third class canteen. Ermal already felt out of place, since other people here seemed to be wearing clothes better suited for a restaurant - suits and nice dresses, whereas Ermal still wore the same shirt and pants he basically wore every day.

"What's all this about?" Finally he asked as soon as both him and Andrea sat down at the table.

"I wanted to do something nice. Just for us. We deserve at least one nice... umm... _lunch_ on this ship, right? Let's pretend this is dinner, okay?" Andrea smiled, slowly pushing his hand over the top of the table to reach Ermal's. He intertwined their fingers, gently lifted Ermal's hand up and softly kissed it.

"Did you hear?" some woman suddenly intruded their lovely moment, by tapping Ermal on the shoulder.

"Hear what?" he asked.

"There's drama _up above_ " meaning _in the first class_. "Do you know Fabrizio? Surely, you must. He and his wife are somehow related to the owner of this ship" the woman continued "and now there are rumours that he's having an affair on board!" she giggled and Ermal froze up. _How can news travel so quickly? Unless someone saw them? Someone told someone about them?_ "I heard it's someone named Gigi" the woman smirked.

"How can you possibly know that?" Andrea leaned over to join the conversation.

"This ship is a lot less... private than it might seem, lad" the old woman smiled, and looked back at Ermal.

"You wouldn't know anything about it, would you?" she asked.

"Why would _I_ know anything about it?" Ermal replied defensively.

"Now now, I don't mean to make you angry. I'm just looking to gossip. Be a dear and pass it on. This affair is the best thing that happened to me in days" the woman pointed to the notepad she had with her, which was scribbled with all sorts of things. Surely, she was a journalist, digging stuff up on the richer families. And apparently, she was doing her job well.

"Don't mind her, amore" Andrea insisted "This evening is about us, alright?" he smiled and took Ermal's hands again.

"Did you want to talk about something?" Ermal asked and Andrea took a deep breath.

"Yes, actually..." he seemed to have lost all color from his face, so Ermal got a little worried. He quickly brushed his fingers along Andrea's cheek, making him smile gently. "I've been wondering... would you like to be engaged to me?" finally he muttered, looking up at a more than shocked Ermal.

"You mean... in _marriage_? We can't do that officially..." Ermal added.

"Not officially. But just so... if anyone asked... so that I could tell them that if I ever were to marry someone, it would be you" Andrea tried to smile but the worry in his eyes reflected the panic in Ermal's. Any other day, he would have said "yes" without thinking, but today, after everything that happened, Ermal felt unworthy of Andrea's love. And yet...


	5. Una per ogni piccola emozione

"You don't have to answer right away" Andrea quickly muttered, probably seeing the horror on Ermal's face and starting to fear for the worst. At that moment Ermal had opened his mouth to come out with the truth. Once and for all. But he couldn't bring himself to do it. He stared at the wide, worrying, loving brown eyes, and went speechless. He couldn't break this man's heart. He just couldn't do it. Which means Ermal had to stop whatever was happening with Fabrizio. He had to let that go, he should have never went to see that man in the first place...

"I shouldn't have said that" Andrea frowned. "I saw you were in a bad mood, it was stupid of me to bring this up" he continued, and Ermal shook his head, leaping forward to grab Andrea's hands.

"No, please. It's okay. You just... took me by surprise. That's it. _Of course_ , I'd want to marry you" Ermal replied, finally smiling at him and leaning in closer for a little kiss. Andrea didn't seem too convinced but, of course, didn't pass up an opportunity to feel the touch of the man he loved.

"Are you sure?" after a while he murmured, and Ermal replied with a big smile of his face:

"I've never wanted anything more in my entire life".

 

After their little lunch date, Andrea and Ermal went back to their cabin. Andrea plopped down on the lower bed and spread his arms, waiting for Ermal's cuddles. But surely, he took his time. Walked around the entire cabin, sang some weird tunes - did whatever he could think of to just drive Andrea insane. And he was an impatient man. Not long after Ermal started the second song, Andrea leaped up, grabbed him and pushed him against the wall, instantly shutting Ermal up with a kiss. _Now **this** feels like home_ Ermal thought to himself while undoing the buttons of Andrea's shirt with one hand and caressing his cheek with the other. Now usually, they'd be surprisingly soft and gentle. But today, so it would seem, Andrea was quite riled up. So they may or may not have been blissfully rough. There may or may not have been biting and scratching involved. There may or may not have been hickeys and spanking involved. And they may or may not have ended up on the floor, because, really, the poorly made cabin's bed might not have survived that.

Andrea dragged a blanket off of the bed and covered their sweaty, heated up bodies, still lying on the floor. While moving the blanket, Andrea caused the pillow to fall down, and with it - both books Fabrì gave Ermal. Both of them fell on Ermal's head, so he started giggling.

"Oh man, the pages flew everywhere..." Andrea muttered, while trying to collect them and shove them back into the corresponding books.

"It's alright, don't worry about it" Ermal gargled, still a bit too _high_ to care about reality. _Obviously, Andrea knew how to do him well_.

"Are you sure? Maybe he'll want these books back." Andrea whispered while shuffling through the pages, probably reading some of the paragraphs. Him, laying on the stomach like that, with his bare back, the blanket barely covering up his ass, was surely the nicest thing Ermal had ever seen. He slowly rolled over onto his stomach as well and looked at the books Andrea was holding.

"Even if so, I'm sure he could afford to buy new ones" Ermal muttered while snuggling up closer, cheekily running his hand all the way down Andrea's back, under the blanket. Ermal placed one little kiss on Andrea's temple, one on his cheek and then leaned down to kiss his shoulder.

"What's this..?" after a few seconds Andrea asked, dragging Ermal out of his bubble. He looked at the little piece of paper Andrea held. Surely it was not part of any book. For it was addressed to 'Gigi'.

 

Ermal could feel every last drop of blood leaving his body. He was sure that if he looked in a mirror right now, he'd be as white as a ghost. Eyes wide with horror, pale lips trembling, as Ermal watched Andrea unfold the little note and take a peak. _Should I slap it out of his hands? But would that prove I'm guilty?_ Andrea's eyes shuffle over the first couple of lines, and finally... he giggles.

"Oh man, someone _is_ having an affair" Andrea smiles and reads a bit of the letter out loud " _Gigi, I want you to know how much I appreciate what you did for me. Thank you. I've been thinking of ways I could repay you, and maybe the one I chose wasn't good enough_ " Andrea stops for a second and coughs, trying to hide laughter. "Can you believe this guy? Wait, does this mean, if he gave you these books, this is the same guy that journalist was talking about? Oh man, that Gigi dude is fuuuucked" he giggled and finally looked up at Ermal who pretty much was on the verge of fainting. "Are you feeling alright? You look a little pale" Andrea gently brushed his fingertips along Ermal's forehead, cheek, and stopped at his lips for a second "You're not getting seasick, are you?" Andrea asked, slowly pushing a couple of stray curls out of Ermal's eyes.

"No, I'm fine, really." He tried to reassure Andrea, but it probably didn't work all too well considering Ermal still looked like a white sheet. Andrea stared at him for a couple of seconds, and then looked back at the note.

" _I hope to see you again. Meet me at midnight in the same spot, if you change your mind and want to continue what we started. Signed, Fabrizio_ " Andrea gasped and turned to Ermal "Babe, we should find this guy! He _has_ to read this note. Oh man, I'm a sucker for a happy ending. What do you say?" He asked excitedly and moved a little bit closer to kiss Ermal's lips.

"It doesn't bother you that he's married?" Finally he managed to ask, to which Andrea just shrugged.

"I mean, if he doesn't care about his own marriage, why should I?" He pressed his lips together and smirked "Besides, I'm all for two random dudes hitting it up" Andrea laughs and slowly stands up letting the blanket fall back on the floor. For a couple of minutes there, Ermal had the best view possible.

"How do you know Gigi isn't a girl?" Ermal asked after he finally got at least a little bit of his normal color back.

"Well, if so, then that means Fabrizio is an _incredibly_ boring man, who, on top of it all, can't even send love letters properly" Andrea giggled and put the note on the table. He spent the next few minutes dressing up, whereas Ermal spent that time pretty much panicking.

 

Was there a right way to tell your fiancé that he was basically helping his love hook up with someone else? At least Ermal couldn't come up with any. But then again he was too preoccupied with dealing with panic attacks. He knew that as soon as one of them spotted Fabrizio, it would be over, because, surely, the tattooed man would be quick to refer to him as 'Gigi'. Ermal knew he had to come clean. As soon as possible.

"That lady said Fabrizio is... _engaging_ with someone from third class... Do you think it's someone from our floor? It could be our neighbour and we wouldn't even know it" he exclaimed so excitedly that it broke Ermal's heart. Andrea probably felt as if he was solving a mystery, except... this was one mystery he shouldn't know the answer to. Both of them came back on deck. Andrea was looking around, still holding that piece of paper that surely drove Ermal insane. _Why would Fabrì even write me anything? When did he do it? He must've done it while I was dressing up, getting ready to leave_...

"Look! That guy looks like a Fabrizio! It's him, isn't it? The snob? Dinner must be over" after a moment Andrea said, pointed to the crowd and immediately launched toward the tattooed man. It was fascinating how quickly Andrea could add things together and yet he couldn't figure out the most obvious one. At this point, Ermal was basically ready to die.

"Aye, Fabrizio!" Ermal could hear Andrea's joyful shout "Ah... madam. Hello" after a second he added and Ermal realized that Fabrizio was probably having dinner with his wife, Giada. Ermal tried not to turn around. His back faced the trio, he was a couple of steps further away from them, trying to look unsuspicious. "Anyway, I think this is yours. It was among the books you gave Ermal" Andrea said and Ermal just closed his eyes. _This is it. This is how it ends_.

"Who?" Fabrizio only answered, of course, leaving Andrea dumbfounded.

"Is this not your note?" he asked, this time being a lot less sure of himself. Though, clearly, Andrea had no problems breaking up a marriage. And yet Giada remained suspiciously silent.

"It is, and I know where I put it but... who's this Ermal person? How did he get my books?" Ermal could hear the rising worry in Fabrizio's voice.

"Did someone rob our cabin?" Finally Giada entered the conversation, probably leaving Andrea even more confused than before. Ermal, however, quite liked where this was going. He'd rather be a thief than a cheater.

"No, my... err... fiancé, he brought the books back, said... you gave it to him as a... thank you? For... saving your... life?" Andrea muttered.

"Saving your life? What the hell is he talking about? What did you do?" Giada basically shouted and Fabrizio started shushing her.

"It was one moment of weakness, I realize now it was stupid. But someone saved me that night..."

"Right, and that was my fiancé" Andrea butted in.

"I... suppose? He didn't mention being engaged" Fabrizio muttered.

"That's because we only got engaged today" Andrea excitedly added and smiled.

"Congratulations!" Giada exclaimed

"Thanks! So... who's Gigi?" Andrea waved the note around.

"The man who saved me" Fabrizio said.

"Nooo, that was Ermal, my fiancé..." Andrea murmured.

"Now I'm confused" Fabrizio added.

"Me too. I thought Gigi was your lover?" Andrea came right out with it.

"Well, gee, thanks for that" Fabrizio gargled, swiftly looking around.

"So maybe this Gigi guy robbed us. You need to stop bringing random men into our living space" Giada said, surprising probably everyone.

"No, he said this Ermal guy stole the books" Fabrizio insisted.

"No, my fiancé didn't steal anything!" Andrea added.

"Unless he took them _from_ Gigi, as he was leaving our cabin?" Giada exclaimed proudly.

"Why would anyone steal _books_ from my lover?" Fabrizio shuttered, looking as confused as ever.

"OH MY GOD, STOP!!" finally Ermal shouted and walked towards the trio...


	6. i tuoi vestiti in sette borse

"Gigi", "Ermal" both men said at the same time, blowing whatever chance he had of surviving this.

"So this is the Gigi you slept with?" Giada whispered into Fabrizio's ear. It was still surprising how _cool_ she was with her own husband sleeping around. Most likely, their marriage was arranged, and they just went with it, but never actually fell in love.

"You _slept_ with him?" Andrea asked, immediately drawing Ermal's attention.

"Absolutely not" he snapped to which Fabrizio reacted as if he had been hurt.

"You've been playing me then?" he asks and immediately clenches his fists. Ermal took caution and stepped away, but Fabrì cooled off in seconds. All it took was for Giada to place her hand on his shoulder.

"No, everybody, just shut up for a second. I _reaaally_ fucked up here, and I kinda need this one moment to explain" Ermal muttered, still trying to put together a couple of sentenses. "Okay. So it all started when I told you a fake name after I saved you that night." Ermal began.

"But why would you do that?" Fabrì crossed his arms on his chest a immediately became a lot more threatening.

"Because I didn't think it would matter. I didn't expect to ever see you again" Ermal sighed. "And I'm not gonna lie... when I went to your cabin to get those books, I _might_ have had a couple of other ideas" at that moment he could almost hear Andrea's trust shatter. Ermal didn't see him, because he was facing Fabrizio, but he felt Andrea move a little bit further away from him. But then Ermal turned to him. "Nothing happened. We kissed. I stopped it. I absolutely could not go through with it" he said, giving Andrea one of the softest looks he possibly could. It didn't seem to work as well...

"Would you have gone through with it if I wasn't in the picture?" Andrea asked after a long pause. And it took an even longer pause until Ermal came up with a simple answer.

"Probably".

He was done with lying. It never got him anywhere good anyway. Giada, still standing beside them, suddenly let out a tiny whistle, as if reacting to _too much information_.

"So, basically, you've fallen for both of them, and now you're stuck" finally she said and smiled, placing her hands on her hips. Giada looked as proud as ever. Especially since Ermal couldn't disagree with her. He just shrugged and looked at both Andrea and Fabrizio.

"But it's not the same. I love Andrea with all my heart. I always have and I always will. No one will change that. But... Fabrizio sparked my curiosity. I suppose I wanted to see where that might lead..."

"...and yet you don't see him as a 'I will marry you and have kids with you and grow old with you' type of guy" Giada took the liberty of finishing Ermal's thought, and, really, she was correct. But in the end, her opinion didn't matter. Fabrizio's feeling didn't matter either. For it was only Andrea Ermal truly cared about at this moment. And, naturally, Andrea took his time answering.

"Can you do me a favor..?" He muttered "Can you kill this curiosity of yours so that we can enjoy the rest of the cruise?" Andrea shrugged and pressed his lips together. For a moment there, Ermal thought he saw a little smirk.

"What do you mean?" He asked and looked at Fabrizio with Giada, who were just as confused.

"Just... go do... whatever you want to do with him. But then come back to me" Andrea whispered.

"What..?" - that was the best response Ermal could come up with.

"I'm serious. Just... get this over with, so you don't have to wonder anymore. Amore, it's always been just the two of us. I've never known any other love. You haven't either. So it doesn't surprise me that you're getting curious" Andrea smiled and walked a bit closer. He slowly took one of Ermal's hands and squeezed his fingers.

"You're kidding..." Ermal said, shaking his head in disbelief. "I'm serious. Do you think I can't handle an open relationship?" Andrea rolled his eyes and, as if proving a point, he leaned in to place a kiss on Ermal's cheek.

"Surely, you'll want something in return then?" Ermal asked, still refusing to believe what was happening.

"Of course. I'll get back at you for this. Don't even doubt it" Andrea giggled. "But for now let's leave it at that" he smiled "go with him, if you still want to, but _come back_ to me afterwards. And we will never speak of this again. I'll have a whole life with you. Surely, I can give one night away." Andrea ended and leaned back in for another kiss, this time on the lips.

"Awww" Giada immediately reacted.

"Should I be okay with this?" Fabrizio asked and looked to his wife. "It sounds like I'm being used" he added.

"Hey, lad, take it or leave it" Andrea butted in once again, and since no one said anything, the answer was obvious. Instead of awkwardly leaving, Andrea decided to ask Giada on a date. If being honest, it bugged Ermal a little but now he _absolutely_ couldn't say anything. Which was when he realized _how_ Andrea will be getting back at him. Ermal caught one last smirk from his fiancé as he was walking away, holding Giada's hand, and then turned to face Fabrizio.

"So... Ermal, is it?" he asked and Ermal just nodded. "It's getting dark" Fabrì added and Ermal nodded again. "Are you still interested in those stars?.."

"You can't honestly still be in the mood" Ermal said and shook his head as if in disapproval, but his lips bore a gentle smile, full of absolute relief. This situation had played out a lot better than he had planned. When he walked towards the trio, he had expected the worst, but received the best. What more could he have hoped for?

"I'm sure we can make it work. Unless we want to go back to our cabins and sit quietly until our significant others come back" Fabrizio answered and slowly lifted his hand. Had he not been amongst a huge crowd, he probably would have brushed his fingertips along Ermal's jawline, but for now, once Fabrì realized what he was doing, his arm lowered. "Come with me" he added and took one step towards the way to his cabin. Ermal, however, still had doubts. Now that he had Andrea's blessing, he didn't feel so guilty, but he couldn't shake the feeling that this might be some sort of trap. That in some way... _he'll come to regret not spending this night with Andrea instead_. But for now, Ermal just nodded and followed Fabrizio back to the cabin he had visited before. Still in awe by its beauty, Ermal stood still for a couple of seconds in the middle of the room. After that he immediately felt Fabrizio's warm hands wandering along the wrinkles of his shirt. He found the buttons, undid them and slowly slid the shirt off of Ermal's shoulders. He didn't move a bit. And that probably sparked a certain idea in Fabrizio's head. He slowly pushed Ermal towards the bed and laid him down. Fabrì grabbed Ermal's wrists, pulled them over his head and, before Ermal could even react, Fabrizio tangled them up with Ermal's own belt and tied them to the bedframe. Instead of a proper reaction, Ermal just let out a tiny moan. Everything that happened afterwards was so much more different than anything he and Andrea had ever done. For those two would normally be soft and gentle, with some occational roughness, but Fabrizio, on the other hand, absolutely did not hold himself back. Ermal may or may not have been hate fucked that night. And he may or may not have fucking loved it. Scrached up, tired, sweaty curls sticking to his forehead, barely able to catch his breath, red spots on his skin marking the places where Fabrizio's fingers might have held on _too_ tightly - this portrait of Ermal was certainly something new to both parties. And yet what Ermal didn't expect after all of that, was for Fabrizio to stay. He honestly believed that the tattooed man would bolt right after sex, but, surprisingly, no. He stayed to cuddle, and to kiss, and he was still there when Ermal snuggled up closer and fell asleep.

Only to be awoken by thunder clapping just hours later. Ermal looked out the window and shivered. Rain was pouring down, lightning lighting up the entire sky, loud thunder - a storm of an enormous scale was right on top of them. It's surprising that the ship's captain even decided to swim this way, but... At that moment the entire ship swayed as if it had just been hit by something huge and only barely managed to keep its balance. Ermal, on the other hand, as well as most things stacked upon shelves, did not. He stumbled onto the ground and slid towards the wall along with the way of leaning ship.

"What the hell just happened?" he said, waking Fabrizio up.

"It's just the storm... Go back to sleep" he murmured and lifted up the blanket inviting Ermal back. And he did just that. Despite the fact that he was too nervous to actually fall asleep. And it was a good thing, because thanks to that he decided to take a look at what's happening outside and the moment he walked out of the cabin, he heard the crew shouting over the decks. The ship had just hit an iceberg. The damage is severe. _The Titanic is sinking_.

 

"Fabrizio?! Fabrizio! Wake up. Something's going on! Crew's saying we're sinking!" Ermal screamed, quickly grabbing some pillow and beating Fabrì with it. It took a couple of tries, but he woke up and sat up in the bed.

"What the hell are you talking about?" He gargled, still feeling groggy after his sleep.

"Get up. Now! We have to go!" Ermal screamed and at that moment the sirens turned on. The soul-crashing screech, like a creepy banshee, announcing the most horrible events. Ermal shivered. "I have to find Andrea..." he whispered quickly jumping up and leaving the room. Ermal thought he heard Fabrizio say something along the lines of 'I still have to find Giada' but he surely didn't stop to help. Ermal rushed down to his cabin, barely able to stand, as the ship was still swaying, beated down by huge waves. He ran down the stairs all the way to the lowest cabins and when he reached the corridor... he fell headfirst into a river of water he surely didn't expect.

"What the hell?" He snapped, quickly standing up. The water was flooding through the holes in the walls, ground, it was already reaching Ermal's knees and quickly rising. "Andrea?!" He shouted in panic "Giada?!". Soon the doors opened but only panicking people ran out. They tried to make their way to the staircase, they pushed Ermal to the side, slammed him against the wall, since he now was an obstacle. He was the only one trying to reach the cabins while everyone else was looking to escape. Ermal looked through the crowd for a familiar face. "Andrea?" he shouted again, but no one answered. He pushed some people aside and made his way to the cabin. The door was wide open, water was gushing out of the room, but it was completely empty. "Giada..?" Ermal quietly added, and turned around. Now he sure as hell regretted spending that night with Fabrizio. Not because of what happened, but because he couldn't find Andrea right now. And he had no idea where he might possibly be. "Andrea?!" he yelled out, making his way back to the staircase. The people there seemed to be... stuck. Something was blocking their way. And soon Ermal noticed a guard standing on the other side of the gates, blocking the only way out of the corridor.

"Come on, let us leave!" Someone screamed.

"The first class passengers are to get to the life boats first!" the guard answered. Of course, people were outraged, so they started beating down the gates, but so far - no luck.

"Andrea?!" Ermal shouted one last time, and finally someone responded. It was their neighbor. Ermal had only seen him once, but Andrea, being the sweetheart that he is, probably made friends.

"Sorry to say this, lad, but he was out with some woman from first class. I think he was accused of stealing something. He's down in the cells, locked up" the man explained, and holy crap, Ermal almost had a heart attack.

"Where are the cells? How do I find them?" he asked.

"They're through that door, but, lad, don't kid yourself, they're probably flooded by now!" the man grabbed Ermal's hand, trying to stop him.

"I don't care, I have to find him!" he ran a couple of steps deeper into the water, but still stopped for a second. "And that woman..?" he turned to the man.

"Sorry to say that, I think they might have had an affair..." he sighed.

"I don't care about that. Is she okay? Did she make it out?!" Ermal asked. The man thought about it for a second.

"You know, I think she spent a long time in the cells trying to get your boyfriend out... I'm not quite sure if she ever left" he shrugged.

"Okay, I'll find them. And... _Fiancé_. He's my fiancé" Ermal corrected him and quickly ran towards the basement.


	7. Ed una in più perché

Ermal made his way through the water to the open door to the basement. At that moment he prayed to every god he knew that the cells wouldn't be flooded. Or that at least Andrea would still be alive. Ermal took a deep breath and walked down the stairs. Thanks to the way the ship was tipping over, one half of the corridor was still not all the way flooded, so Ermal was able to walk to the cells. All of them were open, so either the people escaped and are now stuck by the gates, or no one really even was down here. Which seemed like a more plausible scenario, because, really, how much crime can there really be on a ship?

After a few moments, Ermal heard voices. Someone was _still_ in the cell.

"Andrea?!" Ermal shouted.

"We're over here!" Finally a familiar voice replied and Ermal sighed in relief. His little cutie was okay. He was alive. For now. But that was all that mattered. Ermal picked up the pace, turned around the corner and entered through the open door. Andrea was handcuffed to a pipe and couldn't even move, and Giada was violently beating that pipe with everything she could find, trying to set Andrea loose.

"Here, let me" Ermal said, walking over to her and taking the metal rod she was using.

"I tried everything, it just wouldn't budge" Giada cried out. Ermal noticed that even her hair was wet, so she probably went all out trying to find a solution "this is all my fault. I took him to that stupid ballroom, and that stupid lady... saw him and... freaked out... I swear to god, I _saw_ her put that bracelet in his pocket, but no one believed me, and there was only so much I could do..." Giada continued sobbing, but immediately stopped when she noticed Ermal, on the other hand, was making a bit of progress with the pipe.

"You're from first class" Ermal remembered "Try to talk to the guard, will you?"

"What guard?"

"The one that's on the staircase. He's not letting third class passengers leave" Ermal said and Giada gasped in shock.

"What the serious fuck?.." she murmured before running outside towards the gates.

"I'm so glad you came for me" Andrea whispered and despite their situation, he still leaned in for a kiss. _It might be our last one_ Ermal immediately thought _no, don't even go there_.

"Of course. I love you, and I'll do everything I can to get you out" Ermal said and slammed the pipe one more time. It didn't break.

"This isn't working. And Giada tried picking the lock with a pin, we need to find some other way to do this..." Andrea said, staring at the water rising in the cell, already reaching their waist.

"Maybe if we could find some boltcutters..." Ermal murmured quickly looking around. At that moment Giada furiously marched back into the cell.

"He's not even letting _me_ through. This is insane! People are going to drown!" She screamed out.

"Is there another way out of here?" Ermal asked, already dropping the idea of finding boltcutters in a sinking ship.

"I know one through the boiler room" Andrea assured both of them. Giada and Ermal exchanged glances and immediately went back to slamming the same pipe. With them working together, it actually finally gave way, and not a second too soon: water was already up to their necks. Ermal grabbed Andrea and all three of them swam out of the room. Turns out, Andrea really _did_ know another way through the boiler room, but it was already flooded and swimming with a still handcuffed Andrea got to be a little difficult... But they managed. They made it out onto the deck where just the biggest panic was happening. The workers on the ship were trying to stop men and people from second and third class from getting on the lifeboats, but some of them would manage to jump on anyway.

"Giada, you have to go!" Ermal shouted to her.

"I can't just leave you two here! And Fabrizio!" She panicked, looking around.

"Go! We'll find him! I promise, we'll make sure he's safe" Ermal said and quickly hugged Giada, thanking her for all that she did. He could see she still had doubts, but she went on to find a place for herself on one of the lifeboats anyway. Good. That's one less person to worry about.

"Where do you think we'll find him?" Andrea asked just as another wave hit the ship  and an even bigger part of it fell underwater. The rear end of the ship was already starting to lift up into the air, so people started slipping and sliding all over the deck. It won't be long now until water will cover up even the deck.

"I have no idea. We should check if he's around any of these boats" Ermal suggested, grabbed Andrea's hand started making his way through the hysterical crowd.

 

To be completely honest, Ermal had no idea what he was doing. What he _did_ know, was that he should be trying to save himself and Andrea, and not go out looking for some man he had just fucked. _Oh, and speaking of..._

"I wish I could take this night back. I wish I had spent it with you like I was supposed to..." Ermal began saying, after which Andrea pulled him to a complete stop.

"I know" he whispered "I wish I could've been with you as well" Andrea admitted and Ermal, really, was expecting questions about what happened with Fabrizio. But looks like Andrea kept his word - he really didn't want to know anything. All that mattered, was that Ermal came back.

"Look, if things end terribly wrong, I need you to know that _I love you with all my heart_ and I would've crawled to the ends of the earth if I had to" after a moment Ermal said, and his words were followed by a soft kiss.

"We're gonna be okay. We'll make it out of here just fine" Andrea whispered, once again brushing against Ermal's lips and then stepping away, because the ship swayed once again, reminding them what kind of situation they were in. And time was running out. The water was rising faster and faster, the rear of the ship lifted higher and higher out of the ocean. They could just run right now. They could jump overboard and latch on to whatever life boat they could find, but they still had to find Fabrizio. Ermal promised. He couldn't break Giada's heart like that.

"Let's move. Check around the boats" Ermal ordered once again and did just that. They wasted maybe fifteen minutes surfing through the crowds, looking for a familiar face, being pushed around, being shoved against some wall. It really wasn't going well. They still hadn't found Fabrizio, and the Titanic was getting closer and closer to a vertical position. A lot of people were already falling, sliding off the deck and falling into the ocean, half of the ship was already underwater.

"We need to get to the back of the ship. It's gonna break in half!" Ermal shouted, grabbed Andrea's hand and pulled him away from the boats. Most of them were already full anyway. Such a big ship and so few boats. Even first class passengers couldn't all fit on them. And Ermal surely didn't want to think about those who got trapped behind the gates down below... Ermal ran to the back of the ship and grabbed onto the handrail. He made sure Andrea was right beside him as well.

"Is that him?" suddenly he asked, pinching Ermal's arm. He looked around and saw the man Andrea was talking about. There was Fabrizio, hanging on tightly to the handrail. Probably thinking how ironic it is that after everything he's gonna end up in the water anyway. But for now, Ermal didn't want to let Fabrì out of his sight. With the ship rising higher out of the water, it was difficult to walk, so it took time for the couple to reach Fabrizio. And then there were three of them.

"We should climb over to the other side" Andrea suggested, while seeing people fall and slide all the way down into the water.

"He's right.  This ship is gonna snap and slam back into the water. We're gonna have to jump" Fabrizio admitted and already started climbing to the other side of the handrails. It was more difficult for Andrea to do so, because he was still handcuffed, but he managed. Ermal climbed over too just in time. He heard the Titanic breaking. It split exactly in half and part of the ship was dropping fast into the water. They had to jump.

"NOW!" Ermal heard a scream and instinctively followed that command. All three of the men jumped into the ice cold ocean moments before the ship crashed into the waves. The splash carried all three of them and a bunch of debris further away. Fabrizio was the first one to spot a floating wooden door...


	8. Ti voglio bene

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this is it. Thank you all so much for reading this and blessing my day with just the most beautiful comments <3   
> I hope you enjoyed reading this story just as much as I enjoyed writing it <3 (and i also hope you won't all kill me for this chapter k bye)

Fabrizio got to the float before anyone else could and quickly jumped on it. Fabrì laid down, made sure he wouldn't just sink anyway, and when everything seemed to work, he gave a hand to Ermal. He climbed onto the door and immediately positioned himself in a way that there would still be enough space for Andrea and then extended both of his hands to him. Andrea, already shivering and grinding his teeth, latched onto Ermal and swam closer to the door. But as he tried to climb onto it, the wooden door started sinking under their weight. That's when desperation overcame.

"There's got to be something else we could do. There's a lot of debris around" Ermal said, looking around for something, _anything_ that could hold Andrea. Everything he could see, seem to have been occupied by other passengers, or simply wasn't large enough to hold a person.

"It's alright. I'll be alright" Andrea just whispered and laid at least his head on the door. Ermal leaned in closer to him and placed a kiss on Andrea's forehead. He saw that Andrea was giving up. The light that was usually so alive in his eyes, had now faded. Ermal didn't even notice when he started crying.

"Change places with me" suddenly Fabrizio offered, getting the attention of both Ermal and Andrea. "I've got nothing to lose. I would have been dead if it weren't for you, anyway. I've stolen enough days, I think" Fabrizio whispered and looked into the water.

"You can't do that!" Andrea immediately shouted.

"I promised Giada I'd keep you safe" Ermal murmured. _Giada_ still seemed to have a lot of meaning to him. "She's on a boat, she's safe. And I think she's going to need you when all of this is over" Ermal said, grabbing Fabrizio's hand, trying to stop him from doing something stupid again. That seemed to have halted Fabrì at least for a while. He laid back down, turned to the other side and started sobbing. Normally, Ermal would pay more attention to it, but right now all he cared about was Andrea.

"Hold on, amore. Someone is going to swim by, someone is going to find us. I promise" Ermal whispered gently brushing his lips against Andrea's. He was surprised as to how cold they were. Ermal squeezed both of Andrea's hands as tightly as he could, trying to get them warm again, but it was obvious that the ocean would win this fight - Andrea was getting weaker and getting colder by the second.

"Stay with me" at some point Andrea whispered, and Ermal immediately scooched even closer to him, almost tipping the door, barely avoiding falling into the water as well. "I can't feel my legs..." Andrea added and smiled. Ermal could see the life leaving his eyes...

"Good..." Ermal murmured "guess now you won't be able to do anything about this..."

"About what?" Andrea lazily looked up at Ermal, and it almost broke his heart to see Andrea as white as a sheet, his lips slowly turning blue.

"This" Ermal added and he rolled back into the ocean before he could change his mind.

"Ermal, what the fuck?" What Andrea surely meant as an angry scream, only came out as a soft whisper. Fabrizio was quick to react to the splash - he got up and looked at the couple. Of course, he understood what was happening. And he immediately came to help. He grabbed Andrea's shoulders and started pulling, while Ermal lifted up the man's legs. Now he was safe and lying on the door, alongside Fabrizio. He took off his jacket and put in on Andrea, tried to get him at least a little bit warmer but that didn't matter. All the fury he was feeling was heating enough.

"What are you doing?! You can't do this to me! Ermal!" Andrea was screaming, tears rolling down his face. He was trying his best to get back into the water but Fabrizio was holding him tightly - there was no way Andrea could escape his grip.

"I'm sorry. But you know this is right" Ermal said, grabbing onto the side of the door much like Andrea before.

"This is absolutely not right! We were gonna have a life together! We could have been so happy!" Andrea cried out, still managing to grab Ermal's freezing hands. "Why would you do that? How could..."

"Because I love you. That's reason enough for me" Ermal whispered.

"If you loved me, you'd try to _live_!" Andrea exclaimed, just like that, shattering Ermal's heart into pieces.

 

 

"Let go, amore..." after a while Ermal whispered. He looked Andrea in the eyes and saw the glistening tears, saw the pain. It wasn't supposed to be like this. _They were supposed to be happy_.

"I can't. _I won't._ Not when you can still be saved" Andrea said and held on even tighter.

"Take care of him, will you?" Ermal asked Fabrizio, and he only nodded, tightening his grip around Andrea's waist. That's when Ermal started slipping out of Andrea's hands. He closed his eyes but that didn't save him from hearing the most heartbreaking scream coming from the love of his life. He could hear Andrea calling his name. And he was sure he still heard it even while falling deeper and deeper into the cold, dark depths of the Atlantic ocean...

 

 

The coast guard found them all several hours later. Those, who were still stranded in the middle of the ocean, were more than happy to see someone come and save them. The majority of people had froze to death and slipped back into the water. Others died from severe injuries, but that handful that made it out okay, was rescued. Lifeguards swam close enough to the floating door to see a trembling, crying Andrea, and a Fabrizio, latching onto him as tightly as he could, making sure he kept his last promise. Only when the lifeguards grabbed both of them, and when Fabrì wouldn't let go, did they realize that he too had frozen to death. The only thing that saved little Andrea was Fabrizio's jacket that, once dried, actually became warm. Both of them were pulled into the boat, and Andrea was handed over to the medics. He had known for the last couple of hours that Fabrizio didn't make it. He still remembered the exact moment he felt his heart stop beating as it was so closely pressed against Andrea's back.

 

 

Giada came to visit him at the hospital. She had already heard the news and she wanted to be there, to hold Andrea's hand when he woke up. It took a couple of hours, but then a curly headed peaked from under a mountain of blankets.

"Welcome back to Earth" she whispered, gently pushing a couple of curls out of Andrea's eyes.

"I'm sorry we couldn't save him" was the first thing that came out of Andrea's mouth as soon as he recognized Giada. She immediately started tearing up.

"I know you did all you could" she whispered. "I had something made for you" she added after a few seconds, getting Andrea's attention. She reached into her purse, dug around in it, and pulled out a little box. "I thought you might want these" she said and opened the box, showing two wedding rings. One of them was still blank, but the other had Ermal's name on it. "You can choose whichever one you'd want to keep closer to your heart" she gently smiled and before she could even regret this decision, Andrea jumped up from the bed and hugged Giada as tightly as he could.

 

 

Andrea crossed paths with Giada again a couple of years later. She seemed happy. She was married again and had two children. Andrea, on the other hand, never managed to move on. Wherever he went, he was reminded of Ermal, everything he ever did seemed to lack Ermal's touch, everything was always _off_ without him... Andrea's heart drowned that fateful night. And all he had left of his love was this one ring on his finger that bore Ermal's name.

**Author's Note:**

> If you liked this, please leave a comment - I'd love to hear what you think <3


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